I think its only just to state some fresh updates to a few of my former male interactions.  Some to revive reputations, and some just to relive. Plus they are random and interesting.  But first I’d like to confess my confusion as to why my single goal of casual sex keeps turning into these mild relationships in which I develop lukewarm feelings for these dudes who are all completely different from each other.

I even had Sunday sex (sober!) with a guy after meeting him three hours prior on a Central Park excursion and was then invited on a weekend ski trip happening 4 days later with him.  That was early February- I’m still seeing this guy.  My male roommate concludes that I have the NFL network in my vagina.

Dating is simple.  Act like you don’t care. It’s the oldest advice in existence, but yet girls have such a problem executing it. Want to know why I can keep guys around?  Because I actually do not care.  For the first month or so, I could usually give a shit less whether I hear from a dude again.  And I always do hear from them.  But its that moment when you start to care that you need to throw your phone off the subway platform as the 6 train is coming.

I’m also not a slut. Aside from what this blog and my general daily behavior may represent, I’m not (anymore) into the whole meet a dude sloppy drunk at a bar and take him home, or worse, go to his place and sleep in his crusty sperm stained sheets.  Not to mention waking up with booze breath and an unexplained black eye.

I prefer to meet my men in completely odd ways, or by dipping into the arsenal of them that I stockpiled while I was still wifed up.  O don’t you judge me.  You should be doing it too.  I don’t sleep with, or even make out with a large amount of people- but the ones that I do I cant seem to beat off with a stick.

This brings me back to these updates.  Last night became yet another weekday evening that ended in the early hours of the morning with too much marijuana and someone in our company spitting rhymes.  Who was this occasion’s rap star?  None other than good old Nicholas from the Sunburnt Cow.  Prime example of how I wholeheartedly expect to never hear from a guy again, and then he shows up on my caller ID a month later.  Why he called me after I fell asleep (rather passed out) during wine and appetizers at Maialino (yes, the one in Gramercy Hotel), I still haven’t figured out.  But why not go out with him?  Its not like my photographer fuck-buddy who’s currently being paid to be in Mexico testing pick-up lines on girls at Spring Break for AskMen.com is going to care.

So we met up on the greenest day of the year, with a few friends of mine and a friend of his- a small primordial asian that talked too much.  After some beers and shots of Jameson, we headed to switch bars, and actually ended up (wow, big surprise) at his friend’s apartment with a joint.  Such a sucker for drugs, Marlena and I.  What followed was nothing out of the ordinary to 6 potheads but included chocolate pie, Flip videos, confirmations of a second date and angry religious discourse. Later came 7-11 binging and a taping of two roommates’ observation of a third’s underwear lying inside out in the middle of their living room floor.

I’m actually exhausted, hungover, and at work with a pile of bullshit that needs to be accomplished so I’m cutting this shit short.   The other update I am to mention is the repeat return of Sean the Southern Stalker.

February 11th

“Remember me?  The cute but crazy guy from back in December.  Around your area and thought maybe we could grab some beers.  Just as friends to catch up, interested in seeing how your new year’s in Australia went.”

Good memory, nice. And he was cute but sorry buddy, no. I’m interested in the path his brain took in deciding to send me that text.  Did he consider probability of response?  How about loss of dignity or blow to ego?

Before this, but after the psycho explosion, he did send what I guess can be considered an apology text, but still managing to blame a little bit of the situation on me.

December 18th

“I know I was a bit too much after one average date, but I wanted to quickly redeem myself for the boring one.  I don’t think you sent off the right signals either because I got them all mixed up.  Now I just look like an over eager fool. Oh well.  Take care cutie.”

I didn’t send off any signals idiot. This I responded to just to curb my own guilt (again): “Sorry it didn’t work out but I with you luck in new york. Have a happy holiday”

Once again, proud of my actions and loving this life.